“…Dude…” Friday Night, March 22 2013

We decided to start the night by going for a walk on the pier. We parked on the beach and started walking down the path, and Gabin took his bike. When we got to the pier itself, Gabin chained his bike up to one of the support beams, only I guess he didn’t think the seat was safe, so he took the bike seat off of the bike, and brought it with him. So there we were, me, Gab, Carlito, and Angie, walking along the pier, and Gabin is just carrying this bike seat. First, he stuck the seat in his pants, which created a big bulge.

Then, some guy looked at him weird, and he was all “don’t worry, it’s just a bike seat, it’s just a bike seat,” so the guy was like “…good for you.” -_-

Then, Gabin takes out the seat, walks right in front of this old couple, and exclaims “look what I can do!” while licking the front part of the seat. The old lady was like “O___O oh god.”

After that we headed back to Gab’s to chop up the pallets we got the previous night. When we got there, Gabin had us try some of his juice, which was preeeeetty funky haha. Anyway, I had been watching the others chopping some wood, and it looked really fun, so I wanted to give it a try. I picked up a nice big axe, set up a pallet standing vertically, and took a nice powerful overhead whack at it. The axe stuck into the pallet, but the whole thing fell backwards, which ended up smashing this huge potted plant that I didn’t notice was there. There was a huge obvious crack going up the side of the plant, and I was starting to freak out. Gabin’s mom was sitting in the living room, facing the other direction, but the only thing in between us and her was a sliding glass door. If she happened to turn around, she would notice the pot instantly.

Charles noticed what happened, so he suggested “dude, just like, turn it around so the crack faces the wall.” I thought that was a pretty smart idea, so I grabbed both sides of the potted plant, and tried to turn it, but the instant I applied any pressure, the whole thing just fell in two pieces, coming apart like a banana peel. Charles thought that was pretty funny but I was totally freaking out.

He was like “how about you and Angie go to the store to get the s’more stuff, and let us chop the wood.”

“You know what, that’s a good idea,” I replied, and left with Angie to Vons.

So we pulled up and went inside Vons, but were hindered from the start. We checked up and down the cracker isle, but couldn’t find the grams anywhere. Angie went to ask one of the cashiers, but she forgot what gram crackers were called. She was like “where are the…. the um…”

“The gram crackers,” I added. Well we got those, and then went to go get some marshmallows; then it was off to the chocolate.

She was all “do you like almonds?” and I was like “yeah, I’m down for that.”

Then she asked “do you think we should get drinks?”

I was like “…yeah… unless you want more of Gabin’s juice :P.” and she was like “oooooh no xD.”

So we got some chocolate milk, and some of those Kool-Aid juice bottle things, (which were extra difficult because we found like 3 busted sticky packs and then a pack with an empty bottle before we finally found a normal pack).

When we got back to Gav’s back porch, Char and Gav were nowhere in sight. The broken potted plant was also gone, leaving behind only a few clumps of soil. I ventured out into the dark of Gabin’s backyard, until I heard faint whispers repeating “Robert fucked us over, dude Robert totally fucked us.”

As it turns out, Carlito and Gabin had planted the plant in the backyard, intending to pretend that it had always been there, and they had buried the pot like a dead body. It wasn’t a master plan, but it would have to do.

We were joined by another couple whose names I forgot, which brought our party total to six people. We headed to the campsite, me, Gav, Char, and Angie in Charles’ truck, and the other couple following behind. Driving there, the other couple kept trying to race us, which didn’t make any sense, because we were supposed to be leading them to the spot.

They missed a turn and had to double back, which meant that we arrived at the campsite entrance before them. We waited there in the truck for them to arrive, and soon we saw their headlights.

Charles was like “wouldn’t it be funny if they didn’t see us here? Quick, everyone duck down and see if they leave. x3” So we all hid, and sure enough, they left, not knowing we were right there. We assumed they’d figure it out eventually, so we headed in.

Arriving at the site, we decided that Charles and Angie would start on the fire, while me and Gavin would start on the tent. So we split up, and Gav and I started unpacking the tent. After a few minutes, we saw headlights up at the entrance to the site. Assuming it would be the other couple, I ran up to greet them, and show them to where we were setting up. When I got back to Gabin, he pulled me aside and told me we had a big problem: there was absolutely no sticks to hold up the tent, we would be sleeping in there rolled up like a burrito. I was like “oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, dude.”

Gab was all “wait, here’s what we’re going to do, we’re going to chill over here for a bit, pretend we’re actually setting up the tent, then we’re going to make sure everyone eats a whole lot of mallows, so that they become nice and mellow. Once everyone is mellow, we’ll tell them the problem.”

I was like “O.o you know, that actually makes a lot of sense; we let them eat the mallows and become mellow, then we tell them… that’s good!”

So there we all were, sitting on rocks in the riverbed around this fire, roasting our mallows making our s’mores, and telling ghost stories for hours. It was so awesome dude, that’s like one of my favorite things. Late into the night, the other couple that joined us had to go, so we were like “alright.”

Then, me and Gav decided everyone was sufficiently mellow for us to tell them about the tent being like a burrito. Charles and Angie didn’t take too well to that, they were like “dude, you guys are probably going to wake up tomorrow and we’ll already be gone.”

At any rate, we decided it would be in our best interest to keep the fire going as long as possible, because it was getting colder. Already out of the firewood we brought, we scavenged for some fallen branches and whatnot in the surrounding area. Just then, we all heard a random voice from the bushes say “…dude.”

That set us off like a smoke alarm; we all frenzied to get out of there. I managed to grab my backpack, and I got a glimpse of Charles stomping out the dying fire while Gabin grabbed the fire axe. Just like that, we were gone.

In the frenzy, we left the tent, snacks, and Gabin’s wallet behind. Charles and Angie left in the truck, while me and Gab pranced back to my place on foot with a fire axe at three in the morning. I think this odd scene of the two of us with an axe may have frightened my neighbors a little, because when we got to my front door, there was a guy across the street watching us intently; I waved at him.

The next morning we went back to the site, everything was where we left it, the snacks were just sitting there unopened, and even the fire circle was untouched. That was one night that I won’t be forgetting any time soon.

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