Boat I – Saturday July 27

Late at night I got a few visitors. Into my room came Charles and Gabin, who were spouting something about building a boat; Yes, building a God damn boat. Immediately I was skeptical, I didn’t know what they were imagining. A canoe maybe? Even that might be past our abilities.


Well stupid is as stupid does, and I went with them. When I got to Gabin’s I found out exactly what “boat” meant. It was a wooden palette, and two boogie boards. Somehow we were going to combine them to make a raft type thing. Well first we tried gorilla gluing the boards to the palette, but they kept coming off.


Before long, Gabin’s dad saw how hopelessly ridiculous we were. He came out with a bunch of ropes and duct tape, and tried to show us the proper way to do it. I guess he got a little carried away, and started doing the whole thing by himself. Meanwhile, me, Gabin, and Charles each took a rope in hand, fashioned it into a lasso, and tried to rope each other while yelling “yeah boy!” over and over in our gruffest western accents. Gavin’s dad decided that duct tape wasn’t going to cut it, so he surveyed the raft and decided that he should put screws into the boards, attaching them to the pallets. He started making holes and screwing screws, all the while us three rodeo clowns in the background continued our jape.


With the boogie boards securely in place, it still didn’t look like a proper boat, so we decided to get some extra supplies. We drove behind an auto shop, and found a bunch of discarded Styrofoam pieces, probably from some recently opened appliance, (which of course we had to whack each other a few times with, while yelling our new favorite phrase, “yeaaah boy!!!”) and some perfectly good bamboo-like shades. We then took a trip to Home Depot for two cans of expanding foam to keep it all in place. We haphazardly broke up the Styrofoam pieces, and stuffed them into the open parts of the palette, filled as much of the gaps as we could with the two cans of expanding foam, and draped the bamboo shades over the whole thing. With a proper cover over it, you really couldn’t tell that the raft was just a bunch of things that float slapped together in a heap. We felt pretty proud of ourselves, and decided the boat’s maiden voyage should be at the harbor the very next day.


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