Darkness on Fuckgiving

Look at them out there, rows and rows of them, each one bigger than the last. There they all wait, and there they will continue to wait, unmoved.

Why? They are fucks, my fucks, and not a single one of them will ever be given. No, I will not give a fuck about you, or you, or anyone.

Even if there is something worth giving a fuck about, I will still not give a fuck about it. No fucks will depart from me.

About not any one, nor about anything, shall any of my fucks be given. If you stacked all of the fucks I don’t give on top of each other, they could reach the sun and back multiple times.

Don’t think about trying to take by force one of the fucks I don’t give either; they are trained to not ever be given or taken.

In fact, each of my fucks has their own little set of fucks that they don’t give either. An observer might note that it’s like a cycle of smaller and smaller fucks not being given.

Each of my fucks is probably enough to raise concern about a lost pet, or a dying grandparent, or maybe even a whole village of starving African children, but I’m not giving any of them, the fucks will just keep piling up indefinitely.

Even if you scanned the entire Earth with a microscope, you would not find even a fraction of a speck of a fuck that had been given by me, because none exist.

Power generated from all my ungiven fucks would be enough to power all the cities in the world… for four hundred years.

Collaborating scientists from 32 different countries have all been unable to find any signs of ever being given on any one of my fucks.

A bipartisan committee has agreed that for each fuck I have, a fuck is not given; do you see the correlation there?


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