Will’s Sea World

This one time I was at Sea World with Will and Jake. We were in line for the little show they have with the whales like Shamoo. I guess the line was a little too long for Will’s tastes, so he decided to voice his displeasure.


“Damn, look at all these fuckin’ Mexicans crowding up this line.”


One of the Sea World staff heard that little comment, and wasn’t having any of it. The staff member wasn’t able to properly pronounce ‘s’ sounds, instead replacing them with a ‘th.’ He strained against his lisp to sound authoritative as he told Will off.


“Thir, thir, thith ith a family friendly plath, and we do not condone that thort of dithcriminatory talk, ethpethially here at the Thamoo thow. Thith mutht be dealt with thwiftly and thafely. Therefore, I am forthed to inform thecurity about thith inthident.”


Will tried to make out what the staff member was saying.




Before long, two security guards had Will, each one with one of their arms wrapped around one of Will’s arms, as they dragged him towards the exit of the park.


Me and Jake looked the other way as inconspicuously as we could. The lisp-riddled employee approached us.


“Are you guyth with that thkinhead?”


“Which one? That one? Oh no, definitely not.”


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